By Elias Nebula

Sunday, August 4, 2013

"Cookie's Gone to Hilo"

Dog, hard on the trail of a petty glue-sniffing blue-collar criminal. Dog's first port of call is always to harass the perp's parents. He tracked down the suspect's mother, who travels under the name "Cookie," an obese and toothless crone (much like the informant, in fact). She was in tears at the bus depot. When Dog began his legendary interrogation methodology, she soon blurted that she had just come back from jail herself.
"For what?" said Dog, ever so innocently.
"For beating up my girlfriend."
You could see the recoil on Dog's naive face, even under his wraparound sunglasses.

It seems that there is a whole conspiratorial "ring" of morbidly obese toothless bulldaggers in this part of Hilo. They quite naturally and without any obvious design, like elephants trudging to their graveyard, congregate at the bus depot, where they leisurely do meth.

SONNY: There's a lot of hiding places in Hilo.
DOG: You go through here, it's like a different terrain. If you ever wonder what the moon look like, it look like the road to Hilo.

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