By Elias Nebula

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

"Son of My Father."

There was an interesting episode of Beth and Dog on the Big Hunt (or whatever it's called) where they were helping the usual clueless hapless cheftestants, seen wandering around in circles haemorrhaging cash money before the Dog team came in to "fix" them. One guy in this particular clown shoe wearer's gallery distinguished himself as a special olympian par excellence by something he said. He was one of the auxiliary bunglers on a team of clownfish. Still, when he was introduced to Dog, he boldly shook his hand and said with blaring pride, "The name is Guy Cantero Senior, bailbondsman."

Who introduces themselves, who even styles themselves, as "Senior"?
A small man with a large problem it seems!
A man with a son with the same name as him.
In other words, a man with a swaggering ego.

Peewit also had a goatee and a ponytail, was in his late thirties. He looked like he'd just walked out of the comics shop after acquiring a $3000 "statue" of "Neil Gaiman's Angela" ("Michelangelo's David").

Dog said, "Guy, nice to meet you, heard about you." He was paring his nails and spitting a plug of tobacco when he said it, but he said it. Later of course Dog called him simply "your guy," and you could see that Duane's easy, freewheeling forgetting of the guy's name really stung and rankled old Guy Cantero Senior.

He was really miffed!!

He turned to the camera and said, "That especially hurts my feelings because my name is Guy –– Guy Cantero, Senior –– and Dog sort-of semi-forgot it. Well no let's call a spade a spade, he actually a hundred per cent forgot my name! And as it happens I am very defensive and sensitive about my name, you may have noticed that I pointedly add the name "Senior" to it when I say it. And now here comes Dog acting like I'm not a big fucking deal at all, like I'm not worthy of a name, like I've been kidding myself all my life. Aw geez."

The camera was not running at the time.

Dog was in L.A. that week. He turns up at the height of noon in L.A. wearing a full-length trenchcoat. Sweat much? Shrewd thinking bounty-man. I'd love to see the "gag reel" of some of these episodes –– Dog wilting from the heat, collapsing in the street from heat sickness, coughing up his tubercular lungs, grasping madly for his inhaler.


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